Tuesday, September 15, 2009

how can you be so nervous & so excited at the same time

Well I am hopefully writing you on the last day of my not pregnant life.......tomorrow is our embryo transfer. Right now I am SO nervous. But I will back up a bit.......

I went in Sept 11th for my egg retrival, it did not go as good as I would have hoped, but it wasnt a total bust ethier. I got there and got prepped and waited on the Doc. Finally we went back, and I got the good drugs, I was loopy, but I could kindof hear my Docs and nurses talking. Cecil was in there with me. SO if you remeber the end of last week I had a 15 eggs, well we could only get to 8 of them at the retrival, some of them where just empty, which meant there was no egg growing, and I guess my left ovary is kindof tilted which made it hard to get to some. I was hoping for 10, but was happy with 8.

We were extactic the next morning when they called and said of the 8, 6 had fertilized! Which meant we were going to put 2 back and freeze 4. Well the next report on Monday, wasnt as good. We are now down to 2 embryos, she said they are almost perfect but of the other 4, 1 just stopped growing and three are not growing like they should. SO SAD! Yet so thankful 2 of our little guys are still hanging on. There is a slight chance some of the 3 that are behind could catch up, so we are really praying maybe one of 2 of them have a growth spurt!

So I havent heard anything about them since Monday, it has been miserable...they try not to disturb them in their environment because one wrong thing can be a disaster. So yesterday and today, I have been a wreck...I want to know if the two strong ones are still growing and how they are looking? I want to know if any of the other 3 have shown any signs of being viable??? Its a nightmare not knowing.......Please keep them in your prayers, there are so many things that can go wrong, they are SO fragile.

Tomorrow is the BIG day, hopefully the 2 strong ones are still looking strong and if so they will be implanted at 1:00pm tomorrow. I am going to an accuputunre appt before the transfer, it is supposed to help with implantation. The next 2 days I will be on bed rest. I rented some movies and are good to go.

I know I have said it a 1,000 x's but the support we have recieved has been unreal..........if I am having a bad day, I know I can be lifted up just by comments and prayers from you guys.

It is in God's hands and I am leaving it that way. He has a plan for us and if these 2 little embryos are supposed to implant they will.

Fear Not. Just Trust. I will not fail you.
Go forward fearlessly
Trust and be not afraid
Rest in my certainty
rely on me
Let Go and Let Go

...............................the greater the fight, the greater the victory......................................

1 comment:

  1. Good Luck!! You are in my prayers! I hope all goes just smoothly!